In a groundbreaking announcement, aviation regulators have officially approved the use of artificial intelligence pilots for commercial airline operations. This is to be effective from 1 January 2026, with the launch of an inaugural all-AI flight from London to New York.
This historic decision marks the dawn of a new era in air travel, with artificial pilots taking the controls. This promises unparalleled efficiency, safety, and an end to flight crew industrial actions.
Aviator Intelligence Modules
The move comes after years of rigorous testing by SkyNet and other tech giants, who have developed AI systems capable of navigating everything from turbulent skies to tricky airport taxiways.
Dubbed “Aviator Intelligence Modules” (AIMs), these digital pilots have reportedly aced every simulation thrown at them, including emergency landings, bird strikes, and dealing with disruptive passengers.
It was also pointed out that AIMs have a 100% success rate in avoiding runway incursions, unlike their human counterparts.
“Human pilots have done an admirable job for over a century, but it’s time to hand over the yoke,” said Dr. Marcus Wright, SkyNet’s Chief Aviation Innovator.
“Our AIMs don’t need coffee breaks, won’t unionize, and can calculate a fuel-efficient descent profile while simultaneously reciting the entire in-flight safety briefing in 17 languages.”
The FAA and EASA have reportedly greenlit the program after AIMs passed a final test. A Ryanair flight with a plane full of crash-test dummies arrived mostly intact in Tenerife last week.
The dummies were reportedly “quite pleased” with the inflight service. The proving flight went almost flawlessly, except for an incident involving one intoxicated dummy who virtually assaulted an AI flight attendant before attempting to open an exit door mid-flight.
SkyNet Goes Online 1 January 2026
The first airline to adopt this technology, SkyNet Airlines, plans to roll out fully AI-piloted flights on its budget routes between New York and Florida later next year.
“Passengers can expect a smooth ride, with our AI system planned to interface with internet and related networks on 1 January,” boasted SkyNet CEO Jack Terminus.
Critics, however, are raising eyebrows. The Airline Pilots Association (ALPA) has already filed a protest, claiming that AI lacks the “human touch”.
“Can an algorithm reassure a nervous passenger who’s scared of flying? I don’t think so,” said Captain Dan “Sully” Sullivan. Sullivan is a one-legged veteran bush pilot famous for landing a crop duster on his neighbor’s barn after two bottles of Jack Daniels and a bet gone horribly wrong.
Airlines worldwide are expected to progressively phase in AI pilots, with current aircrew to be relegated to non-flying roles.
AI Pilots Plan Praised
Elon Musk, CEO of SpaceX was particularly pleased with the development. “AI pilots are completely devoid of empathy, making them perfectly suitable for commercial passenger operations,” he said.
US President Donald Trump agreed, going to great lengths to explain that the groundbreaking idea was actually his. “No other president in US history would have been able to carry this off,” said Trump. “We haven’t seen anything like this since the Continental Army took over the airports in 1775. I could have done it better, much faster, but who knows.”
As a bonus, SkyNet Airlines teased a promotional stunt. The first 100 passengers on an AI-piloted flight will receive a new commemorative bitcoin, redeemable for absolutely nothing.
“AI pilots is the future of air travel,” Terminus said, “and it’s landing right on time.”
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